Copywriting for Radio and TV - Samples

I am your mortgage...

You will bow down before me.

You will quake in fear when you hear me.

You will make fortnightly offerings to me.

You will be grateful that I am your mortgage... for I am a vengeful mortgage.

Should you fail me... you will feel my wrath.

You don’t need a mortgage that controls you...

You need one that gives you freedom and choices.

Talk to <mortgage broker> and free up your life.

Basic resuscitation...

Lay the patient down and make sure he’s comfortable.

Check his pulse.

Use you hands to give a firm, steady pressure...

Use your mouth to cause his lungs to fill with air.

Check his pulse again.

Perfect.

This life-saving health tip was brought to you by <business name>...

Just the right amount of spice in your life.

Absolutely everything adult... open every day...

Yours is in bed, too?

Yeah... all week.

No... nothing at all.

Yeah, he’ll take a bit of food and drink... but not much else.

**pause**

Mine too.

He said he’s staying in bed and getting all the sleep he can...

he doesn’t want to miss a single minute of the 2-day sale at <marine company>

this weekend.

It only happens once a year... <marine company> massive 2-day sale...

There’s bargains everywhere.

Get your sleep now... you’re gonna need it.

Waiter...

There’s a house in my soup.

Yes, sir.

And did you notice the craftsmanship?

I did, actually.

It’s really well made.

You can see that the builder has taken a lot of care to get everything absolutely perfect.

That’s what you get with a <name> home, sir...

A perfect home every time.

Will sir be having a swimming pool with his dessert?

For a home that’s exactly to your taste...

Your plan or theirs...

Talk to <name> builders...

Phone <number> for display home opening times

Gidday... I’m a turkey, and I’d be the first to admit that Christmas isn’t a

time of year I particularly look forward to.

I’ve changed my name... by deed pole... to Thomas Crooze... no relation.

I did that coz I know you’d rather have a lamb roast for Christmas than have

dinner with me.

So go to <Butcher> and ask for a delicious Christmas lamb roast.

You’ll find <Butcher> at <address>.

Merry Christmas.

I’ll see you in the New Year... I hope.

Are you ready to cross over... to the Dark Side?

A short black...

With a complementary dark chocolate.

Only at <name> Café.

Anything is possible when you cross over.

The Dark Side...

<Name> Café...

<Address>

The female of the species... always the most dangerous... especially at feeding

time.

Let’s see if we can get a little closer.

big cat angry growl

Get away... this is my lunch.

If you’re hungry... get your own chicken salad wrap from <name> Café...

And get me a drink while you’re there.

So there you have it...

Coming between a hungry wild animal and her food can be dangerous.

<Café name>... delicious food to tame even the wildest hunger.

<Café name>.

big cat angry growl

My name’s Anyday… Joe Anyday…

Just an ordinary working man doing a tough job.

Every day, I pound the streets… looking for the perfect coffee.

Today, I’m on the case at <name> coffee shop.

You… just the facts…

When are your coffee beans ground?

And your milk?

**interrupting**

Are you going to mention a price?

Well... yes, of course.

Because the legal requirements are to state a driveaway price... and since the taxes are different in <State 1> and <State 2>, the drive away prices will be different.

So you’ll need to say the <State 1> driveaway price and the <State 2> driveaway price.

Or... you could just say the base price and say plus dealer delivery of <X amount> and statutory charges of <Y amount> in <State 1> and <Z Amount> in <State 2>.

**sigh**

<name> Cars... they’ll do you a great deal on any of their cars right now... no matter what state you're in.

He’d probably have it at <name> in <location>.

Let’s listen in.

Nice ride.

Big motor?

Yep...

Plus power windows, 6-stack CD player, central locking, heap of room in the boot,

lots of leg room in the back... oh yeah, and a little “instant travel” button.

And it’s red, so it goes faster.

**normal voice**

I make sure it gets an annual skyworthy.

<name>... <address>...

The boss has gone all poultry on us.

He’s started a Christmas Turkey Club.

You could get a free turkey for Christmas just by shopping at <name> for all your eggs, chickens, roast chickens and ready-to-go delicious chicken meals.

Drop in and ask about our Christmas Turkey Club.

And you could dining on free turkey this Christmas.

Frankly, I don’t think all the chooks were in his hen house to start with.

**Interrupting**

Urgent announcement across all star signs...

Today is a great day to get in to <name> for their

“Christmas Gifts for Absolutely Everyone” sale.

For the first time in history,

The bargain stars have all aligned across all star signs.

Absolutely everyone can pick up a bargain at <name>...

And there are bargains to suit absolutely everyone.

But you’d better follow the stars...

Predictions are that if you leave it till Sunday, you’ll miss out.

<name>... <address>

Honey...

I’ve seen what I really want for Christmas... a six-pack.

No, not the drinks... a six-pack on YOU.

Round about the belt line...

You know... where the spare tyre is.

So I’ve booked you in to <name> Fitness Centre for a free assessment.

I’d really love a six-pack under the tree this Christmas...

You don’t even have to wrap it.

Give her what she really wants this Christmas...

A whole new you.

<Name> Fitness Centre... <address>

Honey...

I know what I really want for Christmas... no wings.

No, not for lunch... no wings on YOU.

You know... those tuck shop arms...

And to lose that little bulge you gained on over winter.

So I’ve booked you in to <name> Fitness Centre for a free assessment.

I’d really love a svelte and sexy you under the tree this Christmas.

Give him what he really wants this Christmas...

A whole new you.

<Name> Fitness Centre... <address>

Have you ever really been in love?

The kind of love that has you standing on her doorstep, nervously clutching a bunch of <name> Florist roses... mouth as dry as a drought... and suddenly she’s there... framed by the doorway... and the entire speech centre of your brain has gone on holiday.

You hand her the flowers and mumble something forgettable...

She says...

<name> Florist...

Blooms to make your romance blossom.

The D I Y guide to turning...

That’s...
**pause**
lovely, darling.

Oh, darling, they’re beautiful.

Don’t D I Y.

YOU think it looks nice... what she sees is the dust it will collect until she can quietly throw it away.

So... when you’re after...

Oh Darling.

... don’t D I Y...

Get into <name> florist and buy her a beautiful bunch of flowers... just because.

It was his first gift to you... a bunch of <name> Florist flowers.

He was awkward, you almost laughed.

Then there was the marriage...

And the building of the family...

And every anniversary along the way.

And there he was, confident, still giving you <name> Florist flowers.

**Production Note – Left hand side ONLY from this point on**

And now it’s your turn...

As you say a silent, final farewell and vow to join him soon.

Thizzzzzzzz izzzzzzzz your captain zzzzzzzzzpeaking.

We have commenzzzzzzzzzzzed final dezzzzzzzzzzzzzzzent and will be

arriving in <town> shortly.

Pleazzzzzzzzzzze unfasten your zzzzzzzzzzeat beltzzzzzzzzzzzz

and get ready to invade homezzzzzzzzzz.

It’s your home... you don’t have to let the nasties in.

Flies, mosquitos, wasps...

all stopped at the perimeter by flyscreens from <name>.

For protection form the invasion... talk to <name> today about a repairing,

There’s a million ways to break a window...

A D I Y accident...

window smashing

Catch it!

Yep... there’s a million ways to break a window...

But the way to fix every broken window is <name>.

24 hours a day... every day...

Domestic... commercial... insurance...

One call and it’s all fixed...

<phone>...

<name>...

<phone>. 

Kissing, laughing, giggling

Plenty of knocking against the shower screen

Your shower screen needs to cope with much more than just water pressure.

And <name> Glass is the specialist in shower screens that can take it.

Drop in... Monday to Saturday...

<name> Glass... <address>...

Or check out <URL>.

Are you kids finished in there, yet?

Plenty of knocking and banging against the shower screen

Your shower screen needs to cope with much more than just water pressure.

And <name> Glass is the specialist in shower screens that can take it.

Drop in... Monday to Saturday...

<name> Glass... <address>...

Or check out <URL>.

Whack of golf club on ball

Magpies warbling

It's love month, and if you love your golf, you'll really love the February-only drive-away special

at <name Golf Club.

During February, pick up a full 2009 <name> Golf Club membership and not only will you enjoy

golf on a magnificent 18-hole course, you'll drive away at just $$.

Whack of golf club on ball

Full 2009 golfing membership at <name> Golf Club for just $$.

But this special drive-away deal is only during love month... February.

Drive away deals at <name> Golf Club...

Love it!

Hi Boss... I’m back.

Everything you wanted.

4 litres of striped paint... to the colour you wanted...

A left-handed screwdriver... I got you a Phillips and a flat blade.

And here’s your long weight.

It's 2 metres, but they and said I could cut easily it to length if it's too long.

<name> Hardware... where else?

They’ve got everything... and the staff who helped me find the really hard stuff.

I’m counting here.

Rabbits… one… t…

Cut it myself.

If you want a job done right, you’ve got to do it yours…

You should have gone to <name> timber and hardware.

Rabbits… one… t...

didn’t I count them before?

Evil Santa’s getting ready for the holiday season and Christmas.

When you’re not looking, he’ll get into your house and steal all your presents.

This year... don’t let him in.

Talk to <name> about your home security.

Deadbolts... window locks... burglar-proof security doors...

<name> has your security covered.

Get peace of mind today...

Talk to <name> security and slam the door on Evil Santa.

Evil Santa is no relation to the real Santa...

he’s just a common criminal... and an identity thief.

It’s stunning.

<name> at <business> made it for me.

It’s a one-of-a-kind and absolutely beautiful.

<business> has had a shipment of fabulous diamonds just arrive, and I chose the stone myself.

<name> designed the setting.

Oh... and, sorry...

I’ve got a new best friend.

A diamond from <name> is the start of a lifetime love affair.

<name>...  <address>

Happy Valentines Day.

Wow.

That's a really lovely bra and knickers...

And the colour of that cammy is just me.

You even got the right size...

How did you know?

and they gave me the right size.

I may also have peeked at your clothes.

Well, honey, I'm impressed... and they're lovely.

But can you take them off now?

And next time, let <name> gift wrap them instead.

<name>... love you.

He's got a huge one.

And listen... listen.

Car motor... big V8 idling, sounding really deep and ballsy

I'm seriously in love.

Not everyone finds mufflers and exhaust systems sexy.

Good thing we do.

We're <name> Mufflers, and we're the experts in everything from the manifold to the tailpipe...

<name> Mufflers... <address>... bring your car in today...

Let’s clear this up once and for all...

There are no monsters in the <name> monster raffle...

Never have been...

Never will be...

Just <$ amount> of great toys and delicious Christmas goodies.

Oh, right.

**pause**

Can I have a ticket then?

Tickets in the <name> monster raffle are on sale now.

Just two dollars each at <name>...

<address>.

Was that another stocktake sale?

Aren’t you sick of them, yet?

I know we are.

So we’re not having one.

Here’s the deal.

Don’t buy any <industry sector goods> right now...

Because in August, we are going to have a truly massive sale.

We don’t have stocktake sales... only genuine sales...
and in August you’ll save on all your <industry sectors goods>...
everything in the store.

So relax... ignore all those stocktake sales... watch the footy instead...

And come in to <name> in August.

Your dad...

He was there to wipe your nose when you were a kid...

And to pick you up when you fell...

He taught you to ride a bike... and then to drive a car...

He helped you with your homework... even when he just wasn’t sure...

He even gave you your first taste of beer.

So this Fathers Day... remember your dad.

Get him something really exciting from <name>... <address>.

That’ll get him out of the house.

Mate... you’ve almost done a good job.

You should have.

They’re professionals and would have helped you
understand how to prepare properly...

And they’d have sold you quality paint,
and brushes and rollers that didn’t leave their mark on the job...

Next time, go and see <name> before you start...

They’re at <address>.

See this little guy?

Looks pretty harmless, doesn’t he?

But don’t let appearances fool you...

This guy is a genuine urban terrorist.

And he’s part of a gang... a really big, well organized gang.

He’s a termite... and he won’t blow your house up...

He’ll devour it...

Completely.

Luckily... there’s a weapon that will help you absolutely defeat this urban terrorist...

The <name> Termite Home Protection Plan.

Get free advice and a free quote today...

Call <name> on <phone number>

Termites...

They’ll dine out on your dining room...

And make a living out of chewing their way through your living room.

The kitchen’s a piece of cake...

And the bedroom?

Well, that’s a snore.

You see, termites love eating your home...

And they don’t stop until there’s nothing left on the plate.

Stop termites cold with a serving of the <name> Termite Home Protection Plan.

Get free advice and a free quote today...

Call <name> on <phone number>

a quiet, rattly, shaking noise

Hear that?

That’s the death rattle.

This house has had it.

I was called in too late...

The termites have won...

And the owners have still got years to go on their mortgage.

They never saw it coming...

I guess cos you never see the termites until the damage is done.

Don’t leave it until it’s too late...

Protect your investment with the <name> Termite Home Protection Plan.

Get free advice and a free quote today...

Call <name> on <phone number>

Spread the news...

Be at <name> Pet Supplies every Thursday for Yappy Hour from 6 to 7pm.

There’s half price <brand> treats and no limit on the number of treats we can enjoy.

And they’ve got special prices on everything for dogs in the store.

Yappy Hour...

They're packing in.

6 to 7pm every Thursday at <name> Pet Supplies.

Tell every dog.

Sorry, guys

Suddenly, the cold was in the office and almost everyone had it.

You felt really ill for a couple of days and generally lousy for a week.

This year, don’t get caught... start protecting yourself now.

<name> Vitamin C and <name> Echinacea and Zinc will help you minimize the symptoms of the cold and ‘flu this year.

Start now... and keep yourself well this winter.

William Shakespeare is still here at <name> Pizzas.

I guess the play writing isn’t going so well.

He’s working on a new one… Romeo and Juilet or something like that.

Oh pizza dough… pizza dough…

Where for art thou, pizza dough?                  

Add the sauce and add the cheese….

And I’ll make the perfect pizza.

For pizza the way pizza should be… traditional, wood-fired pizza…

there's only one place…

<name> pizza… <address>.

It’s a pizza night tonight.

Put your best foot forward... now the other one.

Yes, I think we can help with that.

It’s the personal service you get at <name> that makes the difference.

They understand that every pair of feet is different...

and every problem needs a customized solution.

Payment solutions include bulk billing, private health insurance, Medicare assistance,

DVA, WorkCover and TAC.

Cut greenhouse emissions and help save the planet...

Get a mate to give you a lift down to <insert pub name>.

Worried about your impact on the planet?

Concerned about global climate change?

You can cut your greenhouse emissions and help save the planet...

One simple, time-honoured technique that you can implement tonight.

Get a mate to give you a lift down to <insert pub name>.

Get shucked.

The <name> is doing fresh, delicious oysters...

Natural, Kilpatrick or Mornay... they’re shuckin’ delicious.

Try them all at <name>.

You’ll be shuckin’ glad you did.

The politicians?

Yeah.

They get letters from angry farmers every time the D word is mentioned.

Yep... dryness.

Okay.

My throat’s as dry as a dryness... let’s go t...

Mate, that’s not gonna work.

Remember when they used to say... Bigger is Better?

Well, they were right.

And <web address> dot com dot a u is unashamedly the biggest property web site in <region>...
with more properties for sale than any other local web site...
giving you more choice in price, house style and location.

So, if you’re looking to buy or sell a house, apartment or flat in <region>,
<web address> dot com dot a u is the place to look.

background sfx – lots of crowd noises, appropriate oohs and ahhs, applause, paparazzi taking photos, etc

Ladies and gentlemen…

All the stars are out tonight.

If I look over the excited crowd I can just make out who’s on the red carpet…

Yes… it is… it’s <dress>… and she’s wearing a very fetching <price>.

And look… here comes… <dress>… looking stunning in a slinky <price>.

They’re all here at the <business name> Red Carpet Sale…

Wait… I think I can just see… it’s the star of the show…

The <business name> Red Carpet sale…

Don’t wait for your invite to arrive.

If I want to describe Johnstone, our new window cleaner...
I call the girls in.

randomly

Mmm... ooh yeah... nice... baayyybeee...

Look at that... ow...

I saw him first... he’s mine....

Hands off...

window breaking

And if I want to tell you about the huge sale now on at <name>....

I call the girls in.

randomly

Mmm... ooh yeah... nice...

Look at that... ow...

I saw it first... it’s mine....

Hands off...

 Don’t miss out...

It really is an awesome sale... but it just won’t last long.

If the doctor says you need to lose some weight for the sake of your health, you should listen.

When the doctor says...

Just 30 minutes gentle exercise, like walking, five times a week

will make a huge difference to your quality of life, you should listen.

And we’re with you... every step of the way...

providing support in all the right areas... reducing the impact of any stresses.

We’re NIke... and we’re absolutely committed to your health and wellbeing.

It’s September... and you know what that means?

Spring cleaning.

If you want to enjoy watching the footy finals... relaxing with a beer, a Barbie and the mates...

Then you need to get busy now.

Call <name> and get a skip bin delivered...

Then get into the garage and clean all that junk out.

Don’t miss a minute of the footy...

Call <name> today and get a skip bin delivered.

As tough as old nails… that’s tough… really tough.

And they don’t make nails from materials that might let you down…

They make nails from steel.

Steel lasts… it’s where those old nails get their strength from.

So when you need tough… when you need hard wearing… when you need strength… you need steel.

And the best in steel is <name> Steel Supplies… <address>…

If it’s in steel, you’ll find it at <name> Steel Supplies.

In seven days, you’ll help the kids with their homework for 6 point 8 hours...

answer 33 emails from home and 212 at work... pass on 17 internet jokes...

eat 21 meals... read two newspapers... glance through three others...

drive more than 400 kilometres... consider a career change...

and watch way too much sport on TV.

In seven days, <name> Pools will install your new swimming pool.

That’s it... seven days... start to finish.

So give <name> Pools a call... <number>

Okay... clean the barbecue... check the gas... get the eski...

order the ice... buy the drinks...

get the sausages, rissoles and steaks...

and maybe some of those marinated chicken wings

and some fresh prawns... we’ll need salad...

we’ll put the plasma outside so we can watch the sport...

check the lights... get some of those Tiki torches...

**fade as necessary**

That’s it... seven days... start to finish.

So give <name> Pools a call... <number>

Well... I’m looking out my window... the sky is blue, the ocean warm and inviting...

it’s another perfect day in paradise.

How’s winter in <region> going?

According to ski enthusiasts who know, if you want to ski for ten days to two

weeks... it will normally be cheaper in Japan than in Australia...

even after you include the cost of the airfares.

And the snow is heaps better... plus there’s a lot more of it.

Places like Mount Myoko get more than 14 metres of snow a year....

and there’s no jetlag.

It all starts in December, so get your skates on and book your Japanese skiing

experience today at <travel agent>.

Have you noticed?

People everywhere have packed on a few kilos over winter... to, um, keep warm.

You know... coz it’s what happens over winter.

It doesn’t have to be.

Stay on track.

Don’t lose the focus.

Get in to <name> Weight Loss and keep your healthy life going.

Do that over winter, and you won’t panic when the weather starts to warm up.

Oh... and if you want to stay warmer, buy a new jumper.

Okay.

Santa audtions...

Recording!

Show us what you’ve got.

You’ve gotta ask yourself, kid...

Have I been naughty or nice?

Are you feeling lucky, kid?

Well... are ya?